These are three ways of thinking that I have either grown in, or are still working on in my life.

By us changing just the way of thinking in different areas of our life’s it can drastically change the way we see and continue in life.

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1. Thinking I have to be or become the best.

This one is evident to this day, something I have been working on and walking out.

This failure goes back to pride in my life.

This can be so secretly hidden inside of our words that we do not realize it until we analyze or look back over our life’s actions or how we respond to failure.

It can come as simple as “I’m going to be good at this.” or “I’m going to get good at this. ”

With the right intentions that is okay, with wanting to learn and become a better person or in an area we desire.

To grow, but not for selfish desires.

Yet for the longest time those words came out of my mouth, and where rooted in I have to become the best to earn the right to something.

That is wrong thinking.

To this very day the Lord shows moments I have succeeded in growth in that area, to moments of failure.

One of the biggest growing moments in my life have actaully been losing the very things I really want to win at or in.

Seeing how I respond differently now to failure of my own expectation on my own life have shocked me, and has shown growth.

Having a friend reveal it more and more as you are just around them also helps in growing and maturing in it… Hah.

(I highly recommend finding people that make you a better person and lover of God just by being around them.)

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2. Thinking I can do it alone.

Most of my life I have had some amazing close friends. Whom I have done life with, pretty much anything you could imagine.

Most of you could relate to atleast having one person that knows you better then anyone in the world.

I have 4 friends like that, yet inside of us knowing everything about each other, yet when things got tough I tried to do it all by myself.

In throughout doing things by my self, depression set in different moments, and failure took more of a tole on me because I didn’t reach out my hand for brothers to take my hand.

I filled the void of pain with multiple outlets from lust, to selfishness, to a fools gold version of love.

From failure in morality, or integrity, or character flaws, to death, and heart ache. Everytime I have tried to do this life alone, it has crashed all around me.

I had become numb to things I never expected…

Yet everytime I reached out and was authentic with my friends and God, though my situations never changed right away.

I found healing, and new strength, and wisdom on how to continue and persevere in the Truth, and Grace of God.

Though I failed in it for a very long time, to have brothers(or sisters) to stand beside you in the best of times and worst of times.

That is one of the most important things you can ever do in this life.

Is to be real enough to trust someone with your back and hand, and for another person to trust theirs to you.

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3. Thinking I have to have it all together.

For me to have it all together before I do anything has been an interesting process in me internally before.

When I noticed this was with thinking I had to have it all together before I could lead anyone 3 years ago.

God changed that very quickly.

God shows the peace behind moving in our weaknesses, and how He moves in strength through those very things.

He has done some miraculous things through me which I still don’t understand the fullness of why or what He is doing.

Yet He just reminds me constantly that He is faithful to His promises.

God has recently used me in teaching classes in Bayside College, which is absolutely terrifying for me.

I have no idea on how to set up classes and class work or in my opinion, even teach.

Yet the Lord has done some amazing things through the first class and has revealed so much to me as I teach.

It has all been because I’ve been okay with not knowing or having it all together.

He continues to remind me through people, and His word that He has gifted me in different ways that I don’t even see yet, just as He has you.

 

His Word is Truth even when we don’t see it.

This Peace I’m walking in came when I let go of that way of thinking, and embraced the way of thinking to trust that He has everything under control and to just do my part, which always has been to just be His son.

Joseph III